Ich habe deine geheimen sozialen medien gefunden

Hey honey, I know it's probably a bit of a shock for you to see me like this, it's not the kind of outfit I usually wear is it? I have a little bit of an admission to make, you see I was browsing online and I found your secret account. Now don't try and deny it, I know it was you, you have a very unique writing style and we've known each other long enough, do you think I don't know the words you commonly spell wrong? I know it's you, I know all about your secret fetishes, and at first I was upset you didn't share them with me but then the more I read, the more I realised why... You're actually kind of pathetic aren't you?